Sinclair Sexsmith is an educator, coach, and writer specializing in sexualities, genders, and relationships. They produce the award-winning personal online project Sugarbutch Chronicles: The Sex, Gender, and Relationship Adventures of a Kinky Queer Butch Top since 2006. With works published in various print anthologies and online, they are the editor of  and Say Please: Lesbian BDSM Erotica, both published by Cleis Press. They prefer the pronouns they/them. 

With one foot rooted in women's liberation and one foot in the trans and genderqueer activism of the new century, Sinclair Sexsmith has ample content for women studies students (being a women studies major themself, UW Seattle '04), queer activism, and trans and genderqueer revolution. Sinclair straddles the old-school butch identity and the new-school gender non-conforming theories, creating a bridge between generations, and honoring their lineage while challenging the gender binary and working for change.  Check out their controversial workshop F*cking with Gender (about messing around with gender, but also cultivating a sex life that includes gender radicalism).


  • Gender Studies & Creative Writing degrees
  • Bent Teacher Training
  • Sacred Intimacy through a Tantric Lens
  • Community Word Project
  • Body Electric School
  • Teach Now Training


  • College workshops and lectures about queer theory, gender, sexuality, and self-actualization
  • Sexuality, leather, and BDSM educational classes and demonstrations
  • Writing classes, coaching, & editing
  • Spoken word performances on the subjects of queer sex, gender, and relationships

Mr. Sexsmith loves teaching and facilitating ideas;  Here are his presentations for 2014-2015:

Fucking with Gender

Sinclair’s most popular class. Presented at Drew University (NJ), Brown University (RI), Northwestern University (Chicago), Smith College (Northampton, MA), Swarthmore College (Philadelphia), Harvard University (Cambridge), and more.

Gender can be an aphrodisiac. Let’s explore gender expression, identities, labels, transcending the mutually exclusive binaries, queer culture, and hot sweaty sex. Academics love deconstructing gender—and yet, the world is still gendered, so how do we navigate it? How do you build your gender intentionally? Are there ways gender can “hurt” less? And how do you develop your gender in ways that enhance and sustain a satisfying sex life? (‘Cause really, don’t we all want better sex?)

Developed explicitly to cover the praxis of gender studies that is left out of gender degrees, this is for students who want to put their theory into practice. This workshop covers Sinclair’s Best Sex Secrets, Gender Tenets, and more.

Genderqueer for Real Life

“Genderqueer” is a noun, label, and identity, sure—but it’s also a subset of skills and awarenesses that queers can harness and use as tools for liberation. In insular communities like radical college campuses or small queer groups, it’s possible to create and have our genderqueer identities validated. But when we get out into the “real world,” it’s often totally different. In this workshop, we’ll dive into pronoun usage, coming out as genderqueer to friends, family, and institutions, navigating legal forms, arguing with the reality of the gender binary system, and day to day microagressions (like groups of AFAB genderqueer folks being called “ladies” in every restaurant cafe ever). Everyone can queer up the gender binary system—let’s use it for liberation, elevating intersectional activism, and deep acceptance of ourselves and others.

Identities in a Label-Free World

“But I’m so much more than just one thing!” “Labels are for jars.” “I’m just me, you know?” “I like people, not genders.”

Do you hear folks struggling with labeling their own identities? Either out-right rejecting the idea of labels, or using one but qualifying it extensively? So do I, and there are a lot of real reasons to resist labels. We are so much more than one thing! But what part of identity creation and theories are valuable as we understand the ways that our marginalizations and privileges move through and fit in the world? We’ll discuss what the difference is between labels and identities, and pose the radical idea that words can be liberating and not just limiting.

Gay for Pay: Queer Careers

No, this isn’t about sex work, nor is it about landing the 6-figure executive position at a gay rights non-profit. This workshop focuses on tools of confidence and authenticity to help you see a path to your dream job, and help you start making advances toward the job now, while you’re a student. Is your gayness going to be a benefit or a deficit when you enter the workforce and start getting jobs? How do you out yourself? Should you put “Rainbow Alliance” on your resume? You have an amazing gift to contribute to the world beyond these college campus hedge walls—what is it?

Premium option: Add small group (7 people max) 1-hour breakout sessions for individualized guidance for students from Sinclair, or up to 10 individual coaching sessions to sculpt the path into your ultimately successful future. Contact Sinclair for pricing tiers.

The Sexual Politics of Topping

Presented at IvyQ at Yale University We all have some ideas about what it means to be a top or a masochist, but what does it mean to be a feminist dominant or an empowered submissive? And why do we assume that submissives are unempowered, anyway? Fifty Shades of Grey is on everybody’s night stand, but the politics of that book are terrifying to those of us practicing ethical, conscious BDSM. Yet power dynamics and rough sex can be fulfilling, healing, and even (no kidding!) deeply feminist. What’s it like to engage with topping from a place of feminist theory? What’s the combination of intersectional institutional power theory and sexual power dynamics? In this workshop we’ll explore how consent and agency are key issues in feminism, and how they work in the exploration of topping. We’ll discuss different kinds of topping and bottoming, as well as theories to enhance your personal topping and bottoming skills.

Queer Erotics: Writing Workshop & Spoken Word Performance

2-hour interactive writing workshop where participants practice writing through prompts, share work, and receive writing and performance feedback. Perfect as a joint event with the spoken word club or English department! Performance includes a 30 minute set of erotica, poetry, spoken word, essays, and radical queer politics titled “Do Not Speak the Truth So Loudly,” and a 45 minute open mic for the workshop participants (and other students, if there is room), hosted by Mr. Sexsmith.

SinclairI will continue to do talk about custom workshop requests, and they’ve got a Big List of All The Workshops I’ve Offered in case there was this one workshop that caught your eye but you can’t remember what it was and it’s not on this new list.

Here’s the PDF for this year’s workshops (which you can download here if you prefer):